search off

i officially have put in my notice at the rx. unfortunately i'll be stretching things out there through the rest of june. i was ready to just end it and i am still ready to just end it but, i am not so good at saying no. i am trying to convince myself that it won't be all that bad and that i will be thankful for a couple more weeks worth of baby paychecks, like pocket change, making good on gas and cigs. maybe two of the most important non necessities of life. i will walk away from the rx with an open door, the offer to come back whenever i want, so come christmas, i may but, i seriously doubt.

after all it comes down to my own personal search off. in search of real moments and uninterrupted thoughts. searching for time, time to be really alone, time to make a piece of art slowly rather than frantically. i am over waiting. i am ready to dig into this summer, even though it looks more like it won't start for me until july. i am seeking a few more days, just enough, to finish what is the what to begin the chosen. i am looking for strawberries and a brand new bicycle. i imagine a couple of hours of zero responsibility and maybe a moment or two to make my favorite indian dish. i need a good night time walk, a conversation with the trees and grass, and cracks in the sidewalk. i would like to find new sheets and sleep past six twenty a.m. and i'd like to give away more stuff and paint my magazine rack matte black.

i'd like to know just a little bit more. and i'm curious about alot. it all seems to hinge on quitting and finding a little pencil topper...above, see? the little slitted sphere spins, go figure, what's it for? it came on top of a fifty year old pencil that was in a bunch tied up with a rotten rubberband given to me by my mommom and poppop. is it plainly decorative or in someway for someuse? any of you know, take a guess...leave a comment, send me your mailing address and i'll send you a stack of my paper quilt cards. 4free4real. my email is catcollier@hotmail.com now you got it? maybe help me, feed my need to detective here. go to search out some zzz's. outtahere.

in the brief

there isn't anything brief about the last months passed. i have missed and missed beyond missed this place, the void that not having the internet, sort of left. before november of last year i had an easier time of getting on the w.w.w. while working, and i mean simultaneously surfing and working. my job at university was difficult and i found myself checked out and ready to move on, hence my surfing ways. not to say i'm proud of it all but, now things are really different. i really like my job, it is challenging and i'm not half as bored as i used to be. i wasn't up to meeting the challenges at university anymore and plus i felt myself getting sucked into shall we say female drama. unga! all is better. all is right.

today is a new day with the w.w.w. literally right at my fingertips, right here in my tree house apartment. i have put this moment off for such a long time and can't bare to think about comcast being the answer but at least i'm here and really thankful. i suppose to some, internet comes with and out of necessity. for me, well, i have lived without cable television for probably close to over ten years, and a personal computer for as long. i only cable for a short time in apartment i was renting from chief stirfry, because he was splitting it up amongst several tenants. having a computer wasn't a priority. i have always been one of those kinds of girl that didn't need a whole lot to be super happy. i have even debated about the conversion to digital in february 2009, i mean, me getting a converter box for my antenna "armadillo" television. i was thinking about just packing up my television and going without. yeah.yeah.yeah.who the heck knows why this is important. blogs are only for the blogger, aren't they? i won't pretend this act of typing doesn't make me feel super good. i would type this way, stream of some consciousness anyway, even without blogger or the internet. i makes me feel good and it's selfish and i'm not worried about what people think about bloggers expressing themselves so openly on the web. in the big scheme of things, i am not so sure it will matter much. no philosophy please.

in the last months i prepared feverishly for the clothesline art show. i created 14 new works, which might not be a whole lot but i not a full time artist person. i barely had enough time between my 8-5 and my 6-9 to get enough art made. clothesline was really nice and went really well. i'm so proud of what we are able to accomplish with one another and how well the community responded. it's not easy and i've mostly doubted my place in all of it more than once or twice but the more distance and time i have that separates me from the event, i look back with great joy and soaked up inspiration and better friendships and more learning about love.

i will be taking better of photos of my artwork and posting those unsold pieces on etsy as soon as physically possible. i'm eager to begin a new chapter, work on art again and get back into communicating with my friends via the blogosphere. i have small family announcements and images of little nephews to write about. i am looking forward to writing about what i'm reading. reading more than i have ever read in my life, except for maybe when i was in the first grade. book clubs are the coolest thing ever. i'm excited about sharing things again, things i find and things i think about. the stupid and silly stuff that doesn't always amount to much in the end but hopefully lifts others up in their daily lives, you know? i'm eager to share my publishing story(ies), it's still happening but ever so slowly, i had no idea. i'm eager to work and to help and create a place again for mostly my family to catch up with me. friends are more than welcome too.

for now i'm out but i'll be back. home i where the www is! horray!

in the red

last night i finished up number 8, in the red and started on number 9, yet to be titled. i am completely please how this series of works has come together. i have really loved working with the wood grain contact paper and vintage dollhouse wallpaper. it has been a thrill to watch what happens after applying the white layer of paint and see lines and values reveal themselves. i have got this method down, by no means has it become easier but i don't feel like i'm stumbling through the parts that make me nervous. i was initially very concerned with drawing and getting the trees just right. then it became necessary to get some better xacto knife blades and then no more glossy mod podge. all i can handle is the matte finish mod podge. some of my first pieces are a little more experimental but after settling in i have found my niche.

i am always looking for the right colors and knew i needed to work in black and white and did not feel like i had the right kind of paper and then i had that ah-ha moment last night around midnight. i finally decided to use the vintage family photos i bought years ago. i hope to have the vintage family photo trees done by saturday, so that all next week i can make some tiny little 8"x10". i'm also looking forward to getting my paper quilts back, they should be here tomorrow. i'm still shooting for about 20 pieces total. we'll see. or i suppose you'll have to come to the show to see. i just cannot wait to see it all together. my work and then also everyone elses. woohoo!

Blue Television Trees

time is flying and i have only got 16 more days to make and create. sofarso good. it seems like so little time, only two weeks. are you all ready. you are coming, right? and well. i have so much catching up to do here but with so little time, it isn't going to happen. at least i have something new to show for my absence.
the wonderful posters should be seen all around town this weekend or sooner. we've got invites in the mail and more to go out asap. life is terribly good. good as in the weather has been absolutely fantastic, i am allergy free, never had 'em. and well the trees are providing the inspiration i need. plans have changed, i'm not hitting the road afterall, i was heading out to seattle with my friend but the trip was pushed up and now she's gone and i'll just have to visit her in the next couple of months.

aside from clothesline and collier construction, i'm not doing anything much except make more art. i'm thinking about doing some 8"x 10" trees, same size as my paper quilts. single trees for single users, whatever. in new news i received the final template for the book and good news, it'll be on bookshelves come the fall, in my hands, yipes! it's not all o' crock afterall. i was seriously beginning to wonder, wander and wishing i had my quilts. went to four bridges, did you? good and amazing work. will share details asap. over and out.

six down

the dollhouse wallpaper trees are the lastest in my growing forest series. i used some of that wonderful dollhouse wallpaper from katie and incorporated more wood grain. i love this one. wish i was home during good daylight hours inorder to take better photos.

have a nice weekend all.