permission to

i got back from the gulf shores area on saturday early afternoon. i am so glad to be at home. gulf shores isn't really all that great. it is hot and muggy, cloudy or overcast. there are few breezes and lots of seaweed and a jellyfish plague in the ocean water. we went out to eat a couple of times and that was nice enough. i slept a good bit of the time and read on the beach and swam in the pool. but you couldn't pay me to live in gulf shores. it is really flat there, except for the random mountains of condos. i don't have much more to say about the trip.

when i got home on saturday i took a three hour nap because we left g.s. at 5.am in the morning. then saturday night i went to the aaron and travis home for the ammons going away party. it was alright. i spent some with laurie and capria which was really nice. i saw little sara but she stuck herself in the corner with karioke. there were quite a few people there and i spoke with abby a little bit and after that nobody...sunday came around and i started working on three pieces of artwork all at once. the first one is a larger piece that i've worked on over time, but have never finished. the second is a clipboard piece that now has a positive/negative space of a plant in my apartment. the third is a clipboard piece that has a painting of a building. i still have a lot to work on though. sunday night i went to charity and lang's house for another going away party for paul and capria and chris and ann and brooke cone. i got there late and they had already started the toasting and well wishing. i spoke with ann a. for sometime and tried to sell a cookie sheet with pie overflow on it as a piece of art to mason wolfe. i was selling it for five dollars. i came home at twelve twenty and went straight to bed.

now i'm at work. blah blah blah. i don't have permission to talk about people behind their backs. and my negative attitude towards some of the people i work with will definitely catch up with me in the end.

twenty seven more days until i see my 45.

recipe for destruction

a recipe for destruction per the nation of dopeattic

4 1/2 hours of sleep
1 million problems @ work
2 million irrational thoughts
500 stupid questions asked by coworkers
10 calls from patients
1000 horrible mistakes i make a day

this all may seem quite pessimistic but that is exactly how i feel. tonight it's:

pack for vacation 4 days/3 nights
iron some clothes
make choc.chip oatmeal cookies
angela f. spend the night
get beach chair from the cousins
top priority-nap

i'll be overwhelmed but at least i'm not working for the next 3 days. relief and relaxation. angela f. and i went to the dinky farmer's market at lunch today. she bought two watermelon, 1 cantaloupe, 1 honeydew, 2 avocados, blackberries, peaches and a pineapple. the doctors that i work for send the office to the beach every summer. they afford the condo and the evening meals and then the rest of the time we sit on the beach. it's a super nice perk, i'm not complaining one ounce. last year i stayed intown and worked. it was absolutely hellacious and i will never do it again. all and all the beaches on the mainland will never compare to the beautiful places the 45 shared with me when i went to honolulu. bellows beach, waikiki et cetera. i have fond memories and have had pleasant enough experiences at the jersey shore and west coast sand dunes/cliffs, still the fact remains that HI is awesome. if there weren't the mountains and the urban city sprawling out with a variety of cultures and races i say forget about it, but it's a damn paradise.

six.o.flyers

i had an event-filled weekend that ended too soon. just to let you know, i may never have any pictures and i may never link you to anything really special. i had spent several hours last week relearning photoshop and produced five or six flyers. i'm not able to put them up for you to look at, at this point because as i've mentioned before i have no www access. i'm not really that interested in paying for it either. at least not right now. i know that photoshop must really be old news for some of you, but i've never been interested in making art on the computer. i'm interested in what other people are making with design/art software though. i've always concentrated on making my work look as though it has been created on the computer. i've had people comment on the fact that it looks as though i've cut and pasted it literally. usually my response has been well yeah, duh, i did cut and paste and there are real bits of paper, not just one color print of something i put together in a program. for along time i was making weekly trips to kinko's to do color copy manipulations. i would work on a piece and then take it down there and basically set up my own little studio in the facility. shrinking, enlarging, and using transparencies. kinko's wore my pocket out though. now it's card board and old wrapping paper and lots o' origami paper. things that don't cost too much. i've checked into the national collage society and some of the art festivals in honolulu.

double helix

it is a calm corner of my mind that i finds me here. i am accustomed to waking up on sunday mornings and turning on the television to see charles osgood on sunday morning. i remember watching the race for the double helix when i was a freshman in high school biology class. there is a exhibit at the guggenheim museum in new york called speaking with hands. a man's historically broad collection of photographs showing hands. i thought of fenn when i saw some of the photos in this feature story. on wednesday the fourth i am going with my coworkers to the beach further south. i am spending a good portion of my day cleaning the cigarette ash out of my car and doing laundry. my family celebrated three birthdays yesterday. my father turned fifty, my brother and his wife turned twenty four. my brother is almost half my dad's age. aaron favors my father in personality, character, demeanor, bookishness, et cetera. my father and aaron are not really handymen. they usually read a book and learn how to fix the washing machine or shower wall.

i've been listening to the 12"species: direct descendants: final fantasy. a hiphop trio out of honolulu hawaii. then today i slipped in natural ting' featuring the 45REVOLVER:djJahSon, while vacuuming the black car that i have. i spread the reggae gospel throughout the neighborhood. no one was listening except for myself. the sound was just being absorbed by moist, humid air. like the judo room we used to play in as kids. sound proof padded walls, yuck.

i have some explaining to do here but it will definitely have to wait. i've got to take it slow, measure my steps in other words.

tea @ 8

last night i went to my brother and sister in laws home in st. elmo. they invited me over for tea at eight o' clock p.m. my brother just got finished reading the 911 commission report and we spent the evening in tea, cookies and politics. aaron and laurie went to b&n's and picked a copy of the report up for me. i just now started reading it. i am finding out quickly that it'll have to be my beach reading material.